sbluesnow (sbluesnow) wrote in sblue_snow,

[FIC] Empty bed in the morning

Title: Empty bed in the morning
Author: sbluesnow
Group(s): Super Junior
Main: Archive
Pairing(s): Donghae x Eunhyuk
Chapter(s): One-Shot
Summary: The world lost its color. It's no longer blue or red or purple or anything. Just a blank and empty place.


The world no longer seems bright. There is no laughter. No smiles. No treasures. No warmth. No love. No heart.

It's just blank empty space that is there for one purpose.
To exist.
To live.
To be there when there is nothing worth to be here for.
To be here to torture those who are now blind and see nothing but dark.
Dark colors. Dark light.
Their eyes can see. Not details. Not faces.
Just blurs of the past and the people. Definitely not the future.

Waking up in the morning and seeing nothing there, it makes a person wonder, where are you?
Why aren't you here?
You were here before I went to sleep. You were here when I got up yesterday for the usual early morning schedule. You were here when I came home from the busy schedule. You were here. You've always been here.

But now suddenly I don't see you.

Or is it that you don't see me?

Have we drifted so much?

You used to be my everything. I could tell you anything and not be afraid of your reaction. Whether it was anger or acceptance I was always ready for it. Now, there isn't even a now.

There's only the past.

The future is nothing.
The eyes can't see when it's dark out. Even during the day, there are moments when the light is gone. The sun is gone. Only darkness remains.

You leave for a while then come back when I'm about to go crazy. When I'm about to break down and hate you. That's when you come back and continue living like normal. Like you had never left, like we had never drifted. Like the past.

I want to go back to that so much. I really do. I miss it so much. I try to recreate those moments and make new moments but you always disappear before I can do anything. Just as I'm about to, you leave again.

How many times are you going to do that?

Leave me and let me die inside. Let my heart build up and build walls around it, to protect itself from getting hurt but then you would come back and just with one blink of your eyes, the walls crumble and break.

How many times are you going to play Death?

Kill me then revive me to let me live on with my life. Live on but not with the happiness I should feel towards you, to see you again.

You kill me. Then you let me live.

You. Death. You playing Death.

Death is near here.

My heart.

I can feel it already dying.

Slowly bit by bit, piece by piece, it's going to shatter and I'm going to hate you.

For good.

I'm taking a step forward. To grow stronger and to get through this and not get hurt more and more with each time you leave. I'm trying to open up. To open my heart and to let others in and not just close. To tell them my troubles and worries.
But can I really?
Can I trust them to not leave me too?
Like you do?
You come back.
But the scars that you leave behind never heal.
They grow until it's beyond repair now.

I don't want to hate you. It's against the world to do that.

But I feel like I will.
What I feel nine times out of ten don't ever change.

For once I hope that my feelings will change to not hate you now or ever.

To not keep others out and push the people who care about me away because of fear.

Fear of what will happen.
Fear of them being like you.
Fear of experience being played by Death all over again.

A/N: nothing.
Comments are welcomed~♥
Tags: !fanfiction, group: super junior, pairing: donghae x eunhyuk
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